Ada and I have been through some rough times lately. I don't know how to control that girl. She now throws multiple tantrums a day. Once she gets started, it's a long road back to sanity. She screams, moves around furniture, opens all the cupboards and drawers in the kitchen, turns on the lights in the bedrooms and then shuts the doors, attacks Kate, etc. Yesterday she hit a new low by smacking me with a toy after I told her to apologize to Kate. We can't confine her to her room anymore (she pulls off the thing we put on her doorknob to keep her in) so the only thing we can think of is to put her in her carseat until she calms down. When she get like this, she is completely disobedient. It has been very difficult for me. My patience is at a new low and my anxiety is at a new high. I got a few library books to give me some ideas on what to do. I'm at a loss here. I haven't read much yet, but one thing that sometimes helps is to tell her stories about people being naughty. She usually calms down enough to listen. Anyone out there have any advice?
She has said a few hilarious things lately. She really absorbs everything she hears. Some gems:
*We were driving in the car and she said, "Mommy, did you know that penguins are birds? But they can't fly."
*We were at the playground and whenever she came up to me I'd ask her if she wanted to go home or stay. She kept saying, "I want to stay...and be myself."
*My personal favorite: Last night as she was eating dinner, she turned to me and nonchalantly said, "Mommy, did you know that Santa Claus is called pere Noel in France?" She then added, "And papai Noel in Brazil, and Saint Nicolas in Belgium." So random! Yes, she still sometimes wants to listen to Christmas CDs and watch Christmas movies. In June.
8 comments:
We don't have any kids but when we were on the train in Russia, the way that the couple got their little guy to settle down was by telling him that "A mean lady is going to come and get you." or the "That man over there is going to come smack you." LOL - I was amused. Not sure if it works though (it worked for them).
oh that Ada. She sure says some funny things. Sorry she is being a CrAzy kid......
I'm sorry Alison. I know that must be so frustrating. I was telling Tyler on Sunday that I think that she is SO incredibly smart that her brain is always working 10 steps ahead of her but she still is only 2! Here is a funny quote I found about Albert Einstein: "Little Albert Einstein was not an easygoing child. He threw temper tantrums, and when he did, he also threw objects at anyone in sight, including a tutor and especially his little sister, Maja. She remarked that it takes a sound skull to be the sister of an intellectual."
I think Kate might have a sound skull. :)
BTW, I think the carseat idea is wonderful. At least it is keeping her contained and she cant be destructive.
Sounds like you are doing the best you can.
When I was babysitting a lot I completely ignored tantrums, telling the children that I would listen when they stopped, or that they could do "x" thing once they had decided to do "y" thing (such as we could go on a walk after the binky was put in the crib). The trick was to immediately respond as soon as the tantrum ended/"x" thing was done, and I would give them my full attention.
However, they never opened cupboards. When they would throw things I set them in a "time out" spot and if any other children were in danger I removed the other children and set the child back in the time out (which was just somewhere the child could still see me). Anyway, and then continue ignoring. Occasionally reminding the child that as soon as the tantrum ended I would pay attention.
I'll ask around if there's a book someone would recommend.
Good luck, I'm sure you're doing all you can.
I wish that I had some great advice for you but I really don't. I do know how frustrating it is when your kids hit total meltdown mode. I agree with Rachelle that I honestly think it is becuase she is just so so darn smart.
Two words: Ask Jill.
Ada is going to be a smartie like her mommy.
I don't know if this would work for Ada, but it worked for Tommy. Tommy has been having the terrible 2's (just 2 years later). He would throw awful tantrums that would go on for hours. It was miserable for all of us. My mother-in-law received a stroke of inspiration that has saved us.
We started a "good" chart for Tommy where he can put stickers on it for being good and then earn stickers for a "prize". The prize is something fun he likes to do, for example, go to kangaroo zoo, rent a fun movie, go swimming, etc. He has to get a weeks worth of stickers to get the prize.
If you are interested in doing this one thing you want to keep in mind: You want to set the goals so they are attainable. For instance, Tommy is 4 and so he should be able to go an entire day without a tantrum, so we set that as the goal. However, you could say a couple of hours and then they get a sticker, etc. Does that make sense?
I don't want to sound like I have all the answers, blah blah blah, but I wanted to share this, because it has literally been a life-saver for us.
Best of luck!
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