I finally have a few minutes to myself. I should be sleeping, but I tried that earlier and it didn't work out. Every time I try to lie down for a few Zs, something happens to prevent it. It's like the process of lying down on my pillow jinxes one of the girls and my hopes of sleep are destroyed. A little background:I am NOT a morning person. Never have been. I don't do well on little sleep either. Lack of sleep is one of the hardest parts about having kids for me. Ever since Kate was three months old and started sleeping in her crib, things haven't been good. She is capable of sleeping through the night and has done it a few times, but usually wakes up several times a night. Not to eat. Just because. I used to be able to just give her a binkie and she'd go right back to sleep. She finally started improving, then got even worse. Then things were slowly getting better and she got shots. Things haven't been the greatest since then. She doesn't want to go back to sleep after waking up. I resorted to feeding her or rocking her just so I could get back in bed as soon as possible. She would still wake up several times, so I decided we needed to let her cry it out. She had already learned to fall asleep on her own at bedtime, but it still didn't help her sleep through the night. So we let her cry in the middle of the night. Then that would wake Ada up. I now have to turn on music in Ada's room every time Kate starts crying.
In the meantime, Ada has had sleep woes of her own. She pretty much stopped napping, but I would still give her quiet time during Kate's afternoon nap so I would have a little time to myself. But that ended up being too late in the day because sometimes she would fall asleep. Even if I woke her up soon afterward, she wouldn't go to bed at night. Tyler and I would be just getting into bed and she'd start knocking on her door. No matter what, she wouldn't fall asleep until after 11:00. She would still wake up at the same time in the morning, so she was extra grumpy the next day due to lack of sleep. Thus began the vicious cycle. So I now have to prevent her from napping so she will go to bed at night.
Since I haven't been getting much sleep (and broken sleep at that), I try to nap during the day. I've tried to nap during Ada's quiet time and Kate's afternoon nap, but then Ada will fall asleep. I can't even go there anymore. So I put on shows for Ada during Kate's morning nap. Yesterday, Kate woke up after 40 minutes. Today, Ada started knocking on my door and in the process woke Kate up. No matter what I do, I just can't get a good nap in! Anyway, last night Kate finally slept until after 5:00 without waking up, but what happened? Ada started yelling in the middle of the night that she wanted a CD on. Tyler and I were both startled awake and he went in to help her. But she just wanted Mommy. So I went in and for no reason at all, she suddenly started FREAKING OUT. She was screaming and crying and bucking (I don't know how else to describe it) in her bed. I couldn't do anything to calm her down. I turned on her CD and went back to bed. The screaming didn't stop. I finally went back in and tried everything to get her to calm down. I asked her if she was scared, and just like a switch was flipped, she went silent and then said quietly, "Yeah." I put her back in bed and that was that. She is crazy!
Maybe one day soon the planets will align and both girls will be good AT THE SAME TIME. Until then, I guess I'll have to be my grumpy, unproductive, tired self. Wow, that was long. I'm done complaining.
8 comments:
Al, I so want to cry for you. I think sleep deprivation is, by far, the hardest thing about being a parent. How can one expect to be a kind, patient parent when they can't get enough rest to make that at all possible? I think that's why the majority of the world drinks both coffee and alcohol, coffee during the day to keep them awake, and alcohol at night to help them forget about the day and make them tired for sleep. I imagine most parents of young children have similar issues and it's just a hard time of life. I can't say I look forward to another child, with the whole newborn phase again. It almost killed me last time and I could nap when Adie napped. The next time around won't be fun. I really hope you get a break soon. I feel so bad for you.
Bean, right now is so much worse than when Kate was a newborn! So I was just thinking about that picture you e-mailed out a couple years ago that Brett took of you when you were tired. I should have used that at the top of my post!
Oh, Al, I'm so sorry. That's terrible. And it's made even more frustrating knowing that Kate CAN sleep through the night, she just doesn't do it. At least that's how I'd feel. Julia is generally a good sleeper, but I get so much more frustrated now when she wakes up in the middle of the night than when she was a newborn.
Hang in there. It's got to get better at some point, right? It's just got to!
this is terrible!!!! I just need to come and take the girls so you can have a nap :)
A mom needs her sleep. I can handle anything except sleep deprivation!! I will take the girls for an afternoon or just Ada even so you can nap. I'm completely serious. You just let me know!!
There is NOTHING worse than sleep-deprivation. It is a vicious cycle and it just makes your entire outlook on life worse. I so feel for you Al! Good luck, I hope you get some decent rest soon!
There is NOTHING worse than sleep-deprivation. It is a vicious cycle and it just makes your entire outlook on life worse. I so feel for you Al! Good luck, I hope you get some decent rest soon!
Alison, I am surprised you are still alive! It has been a LONG TIME since you've had good sleep, I am guessing. I just want to tell you about the book that has been extremely helpful for me. It's called "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child" by Marc Weissbluth. I know there are a billion books out there, but this one is written by a pediatrician who has been researching children's sleep habits for 20 years or something. It teaches you about the principles of sleep and gives you some hints, but then you do what is best for your own children and situation based on the principles of healthy sleep. As you commit to changes and are consistent the outcomes are really wonderful, I promise. I have been using it for both kids and it has saved me! So, that's my advice. (sorry, I hate to give advice because I feel like I am telling people what to do, but this book has seriously been the best thing that has ever happened to my kids, and to me.) I hope things improve soon! We miss you in the village. :)
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